Bird on a Wire

Friends, we're down to the wire.  Just 5 days from now we will lace up our shoes, say a little Hail Mary, and run the race.  I can't claim that we've been perfect in our training program, but we've run a long, long way in the past six months to get ready.  On Sunday, we each did our last long run - happily only six miles.

While I was running, I thought about what I wanted to write on the blog for my last entry before I left for Houston, where I will not be able to access this blog due to the elderly nature of my parents' computer.  First, I want to say thank you, thank you, thank you to all of you who have showed your support in your kind words, phone calls, emails, hugs, training runs with us, and financial contributions.  Preparing for this race has been much harder than I'd anticipated, both because of the time we've had to put in and because of the physical strain on our old bodies.  So many people offered to watch our kids while we ran, or suggested tips that helped combat the various aches and pains that at times made us doubt whether we should be doing this to ourselves.  Anyway, for all of that and more, thank you.

Toward the end of my 6 miles on Sunday, my IPod shuffle got around to some of those songs way at the end of the playlist that I usually don't hear because it restarts the list every time I charge it.  So I hadn't charged it for a while, and I had forgotten that one of my favorite songs - "Bird on a Wire" - was even on the list.  Leonard Cohen wrote it, and many people have sung it, but I have loved Aaron Neville's version ever since the Mel Gibson/Goldie Hawn movie of the same name came out in the 80's (it was a pretty cheesy movie, I admit, but the song stands the test of time).
Click here to listen to it on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9ez80bQW4w

Listening to the lyrics and thinking about my dad and so many other people living with Parkinson's, I just was hit by how much I wish there was a way to make them free from this terrible disease.  If by running one marathon or a hundred marathons, I could turn the key in the lock that keeps my father locked inside of his body, I would do it.  I so wish, as the song says, I could come to him and say "it's completed, it's finished, it's been paid for."  It is one of the saddest things in life to realize that we are not able to take a burden from someone we love and carry it for them, even for a little while.

In fact, sometimes it is so hard to accept that limitation and watch another person suffer, that we turn away.  I have watched people become so uncomfortable around my father that they have to leave the room.  I have sometimes not known what to say to a friend who has lost a loved one, and so I have simply not said anything.  I have often become upset with my mother when she rejects some help or advice I'm trying to give her as she struggles to care for my dad, because it makes me feel helpless.  Maybe this is why we lean on social convention in situations where we can - flowers to a grieving friend, a meal to someone who is ill, raising money for a cause - to feel like we are doing something for another person in a situation where we can't truly ease their suffering.

And I'm sure that a big part of running this marathon is for me, for all those reasons.  It has been fun, if painful at times, to run and train with Matt.  We will enjoy celebrating when it is over and have a sense of accomplishment that we've done something that was really hard for us.  It has been nice to have something so concrete to focus on while we've been going through our long adoption process.  And I'm happy we've been able to raise money for an organization that concretely improves the quality of life for those with Parkinson's.  Aside from those things, I'm not sure what it's all about, except that I hope my parents know how much we love them and how proud I am of both of them for getting up and facing each day with humor, optimism and perseverance, no matter what the day may bring.

Thanks again to all  Check here on Wednesday for race pictures & results, and if you're in the Houston area, come join us on Sunday night at El Patio for a margarita on us to celebrate!!